Sweet Surrender

First of all, apologies for going dark without any notice or explanation. It's been an unexpectedly tough summer due largely to the necessary evil known as the dayjob. I won't go into boring details here; this is supposed to be a blog about WoW and those of you on my Twitter stream are probably inured to my stress!rants anyway. ;) Once upon a time I used to work well under pressure. Now I just seem to fall apart -- mentally, physically and emotionally. I can only wear so many hats and juggles so many fires at once before something's gotta give. Since the stress-filled-dayjob is what pays the bills, everything else becomes expendable.

The blog was the first sacrifice. I just didn't have the time or the mental capacity for it. My play-time was the second sacrifice. There were many weeks where I only managed to log in once, and some weeks when I couldn't even manage that. The results were predictable. A guild, especially a small RP guild, without an active GL doesn't last very long. I was down to two active members and my Officers quietly and mysteriously disappeared into the ether. I finally had to face reality and about a month ago I "suspended" the guild. I didn't have the heart to disband it. But with little to no time to log in and no end to the dayjob-crazy-madness in sight, there was no way I could possibly do a recruiting a blitz.

It was tough. It felt like Failure. And I hate to fail. Trial and error is one thing. I'm not the sort to rage-quit after a wipe or three. When you fall down, you get back up, dust yourself off, analyze how and why you ended up on your ass in the dirt and then you try again. Giving up... that's something else entirely. Admitting defeat was bitter to say the least.

It was also a relief. The game had lost something. At the time, I thought Cata endgame just didn't appeal to me. In retrospect, I think that was influenced by a good deal of GL burnout. So, yeah, it was a huge relief to come home mentally and physically exhausted, often near tears and not feel obligated to log in. It was a relief to not feel guilty about letting the guild down. To not feel guilty if I don't want to run Hyjal dailies. To not feel guilty if I want to hang out with Tweeps on other servers. To not feel guilty if I take a writing night. I'm a bit surprised at just how much all those self-imposed GL obligations affected my game play experience.

Things have let up a time or two this past month, and I've rediscovered my love for the World of Warcraft. I've had a blast hanging out with Stormy and Rush and the crew of Sane Asylum over on Garrosh. To my astonishment, the hubby even logged into WoW for the first time in months and rolled a toon or three over there. I'm actually excited about WoW news and I've missed blogging about the game and my experiences.

I wish I could give this post a happy ending, but the truth is that things are in a sort of stasis at the moment. Work stress flared back up this week and has triggered the pinched nerve in neck to protest most vehemently. I think I'm getting a cold too. This inability to handle boat-loads of stress, especially over extended periods of time, is very annoying! I don't know if or when the dayjob situation will ease up. Despite how much I have to do, I don't know how long I'll make it at work today since my neck is already screaming at me for the time at the computer that it's taken to write this. 

I don't know what I'm going to do with the guild or my ten toons (including my one and only level 85) on Moon Guard. I'm trying not to think about it. It just stresses me out and WoW is supposed to be my avocation. Y'know, something I do fun to escape the stresses of the real world.

Gladiator Games

Have I mentioned that I don't PvP? Well, every once in a while I'll hop into a BG for something different. But I have to be in the mood for PvP and it doesn't strike me very often. Because I find it agitating.

Anyone who's ever been in a duel or a BG knows that PvP is a completely different experience to PvE. PvP is faster paced and utterly unpredictable; a lot of people, including the hubby, find it exhilarating. I can appreciate their appreciation of the rush. Tanking is a rush that I came to love - yes, it can be stressful too, but damn it's fun!

PvP is a different sort of rush - one that, for me at least, is full of panic and confusion. I'm not even sure why I find it so nerve-wracking. Give me an NPC baddie to face and it's a challenge. But put me in a BG, or even a duel, and I go into adrenaline overload and all my logical thought processes grind to a stuttering halt. It's rather embarrassing really.

Enter the 2011 Arena Pass.

The hubby obtained his Arena Pass as soon as it was announced. And started bugging me to buy one too. While on one hand, I'm grateful and flattered that he wants to play with me, on the other hand, I know damned well that PvP isn't my strongest skill. (And that's putting it mildly.) I told him he'd be better off partnering with someone who's good at, and enjoys, PvP. So we approached one of my officers who regularly runs BGs and asked if he'd be interested. He was and suggested we try out some level 85 Arenas as practice.

I'm still not quite sure how my suggestion that the two of them team up resulted in the three of us queuing for All Arenas last weekend. O.O

Fictional Considerations

I am contemplating an experiment. You see, since I got back into WoW about two years ago, it's become my main time sink. Time I used to spend writing, I now spend online killing internet dragons and/or role playing. And while I think role playing in WoW has been good for my writing skills in many ways, not writing isn't. Yes, I write on the blog and in the guild forums, but it's not the same thing as writing fiction. Blog writing is good too, but it doesn't work the same muscles as writing a scene or dialogue, a short story or even a piece of fanfic. I need to start flexing those muscles again. Hence, the experiment contemplation.

/deep breath

So... I'm thinking of starting a journal/story vignette based on a toon's adventures. Or something. I know there are bloggers/writers who do this. I've thought about doing so more than once with toons in the past. Thought about it in a passing sort of way, but never found the motivation to go through with it. I'm not talking about switching the blog focus solely to fic, but maybe a once a week thing. Would anyone be interested in the idea? And/or willing to help me stick to a schedule and give me some feedback?

>.>

<.<

Alternate Realities

I log out of Twitter for a few hours this afternoon and miss the breaking news. /huff

What? You haven't heard about the new cross-realm dungeon finder premium service that Blizzard is working on??
 
Well, then, my friends, let me be the first to tell you that the Gnome and Goblin Engineers of Azeroth have been working overtime on a cross-faction project that will Blow Your Mind! The Elite Engineers of Azeroth (EEA) are proud to present: New and Improved Reality Transporters! That's right, friend! Soon you'll be able to step into a Transporter and visit those long lost friends in an alternate reality for an hour or two and then return home to your own reality in time for supper. No, no. They're perfectly safe I assure you. Not like the early generation Reality Transporters that disappeared countless foolish /ahem brave test subjects. These Transporters are New and Improved! (As based on our previous string theory experiments.) That old friend or lover who stepped into a Transporter and never returned isn't dead or lost in the Twisting Nether as you thought. No, Sir! Your buddies are living it up in an alternate universe very similar to our own and very soon you'll be able to visit them at will. Well, for a fee of course. Time is money friend. And this sort of Engineering takes a lot of time....

Yeah. I know. Craaazy! It's like LFD met Sliders.

Enough with the silliness. I don't do humor well. (Or poetry.) My apologies.

I have mixed feelings about this new premium service.

WoW Narratives

Greetings fellow WoWcrafters! The Pink Pally's world has been crazy busy the past month and not in a good way. Well, the week I spent in Orlando, FL on vacation with the hubby was great, but the mad, hectic rush of work deadlines before and after was not fun.Thankfully, the immediately time sensitive work priorities are finally complete and I can get back to regularly scheduled blogging. I'm a much happier person when I can write regularly. :)

Blogger, that means no more days-long outages that eat my drafts m'kay?

I'd like to preface today's post with a disclaimer. I'm home sick today. I don't feel well and I have medicine head. So if this is rambly and doesn't entirely make sense... well, you know why.

Earlier this week, Lani of Flavor Text Lore posted an introduction on The narrative of the player character. Now, Lani's post is more about how we, the player characters, fit into Blizzard's story narrative. However, the post got me thinking of how we interact with the game world and, more specifically, how it affects role playing in WoW.

All in the Family

This post is in response to the Blog Azeroth Shared Topic of the week.

Kamalia asked: Whether you have many alts or just a few, do they know each other? Do they have some sort of relationship as people living in Azeroth, or is sending materials and money between them just a game mechanic for you? If your characters do know each other, what kind of relationships do they have, and how did those relationships come into being? If they don't, what functions do your different alts serve?

I have a good number of characters on Moon Guard. Most them know each other and are related by blood or by association to some degree. Some of those relationships are by design and some by circumstances that evolved over time. Some of those relationships are quite intricate and to further complicate things, the hubby and I play together so several of my toons are related/involved with several of his toons. For example:

Discovering Diamonds! - 1st Edition

Last week, Vidyala of Manalicious issued a challenge to the WoW blogosphere. The challenge itself was twofold:

If you’re a blogger: Find a new blog today that looks promising, that you enjoy. Link to it on your blog. Leave an encouraging comment!

Here’s my second challenge, for non-bloggers. If you have found a blog recently that you enjoy reading, if you appreciate the content there – whether it’s guides, points of view, or just something to make you laugh – leave a comment.

In my response to Vidyala's challenge, I shared some links to blogs I had recently discovered and added to my blogroll and/or feed reader. In an effort to keep both the practice and spirit of the challenge alive, I thought I'd post a list of the blogs I've discovered during the previous week.

The discovery process varies. Sometimes it's due to a tweet or retweet of a post announcement. Sometimes it's a title on a blogroll that catches my eye. Sometimes it's a link from a comment someone left on the blog post I happen to be reading. Some of those discoveries end up on my blogroll and/or in my feed reader. Some don't. But just because a blog's focus or writing style doesn't appeal to me at the time of discovery, doesn't mean it isn't exactly what someone else is looking for (or that I won't end up hunting it down sometime in the future while I curse myself for not clicking the RSS). They won't all be new, but they were new to me and maybe they'll be new to you too. Some are diamonds in the rough, relatively unknown. Some are so polished people have probably been oohing and aahing over them for years.

Without further ado, Pink Pally Productions (TM) proudly presents: Discovering Diamonds!